If you’re looking to add new things into your sex life, why not experiment with some fun BDSM sex toys? Any couple can experiment with BDSM sex toys, even those completely new to the concept of BDSM sex!
While some might still consider BDSM to be a taboo practice, BDSM has become gradually more normalized in popular culture, partly due to the phenomenal success of the 50 Shades of Grey books and films. While the 50 Shades franchise has become synonymous with BDSM sex, their representations of BDSM relationships are pretty flawed. BDSM sex doesn’t have to take place within the confines of an unhealthy relationship; in fact, many studies have found that those in BDSM relationships (or couples who regularly engage in BDSM sex) tend to report higher levels of both relationship security and sexual satisfacition.
So, if you’re looking to try out some BDSM toys, where to begin? We’ve compiled a list of the best BDSM sex toys for every experience level, so you can bring 50 shades of fun to your bedroom and enjoy some thrilling power play with your partner!
Table of Contents
Best BDSM Toys for Beginners
So…you’re a BDSM newbie. There are a couple of things you want to keep in mind before beginning your BDSM journey as a beginner:
- Always respect pre-agreed safe words and your partner’s limits
- Agree beforehand on each other’s limits and safe words before beginning any BDSM play
- Try to understand what both of you want to get from the experience: going into BDSM play with ambiguous goals can sometimes make the experience less enjoyable: if you love to be dominated, express it! Encourage your partner to be open and honest about their desires: verbally sharing fantasies can be an effective form of foreplay!
Best Beginner BDSM Toys:
Sex Wedge
Great sex is all about the angles – certain positions are just impossible without the help of some handy sex furniture. While sex furniture is not explicity considered BDSM, a sex wedge is a great way to experiment with bedroom accessories as a beginner. With a sex wedge, you’ll be able to see how beneficial sex toys can be when you welcome them into the bedroom: a sex wedge will help you and your partner hit the spot every time! Tip: use your sex wedge in the doggy style position to enjoy some fantastic views!
Handcuffs
If you love a bit of power play in the bedroom, or love when your partner spontaneously decides to take (or surrender!) control, you’ll love the thrill of handcuffs! Whether it’s you being handcuffed or you attaching your partner, the thrill of being dominated or dominating is sure to intensify things in the bedroom! If you don’t have the means to invest in handcuffs, you can use things like tape, rope, or even the belt of your dressing gown! Anything that can restrain the submissive will do the job and let you both enjoy the same sensation of power play!
Best Intermediate BDSM Toys
So you’ve experimented a little with sex toys, maybe you’ve even dipped your toes in the BDSM waters a couple of times. For couples with a bit of experience, the following sex toys are ideal for taking your BDSM adventure to the next level:
Thigh Sling
If you’re looking for a sex accessory that is both a position-enhancer and a BDSM toy, you should try out a thigh sling. Less advanced than most typical BDSM sex slings and sex swings, a thigh sling is a great way to experiment with a toy within the sex swing genre – it’s easy to use and will lead to better sex with your partner. Any penetration will be greatly improved with a thigh sling – thigh slings hold one partner’s legs up, permitting each to go hands-free and enjoy deeper sensations.
Ball Gag
A ball gag is a great way to intensify the aspect of submission and domination during BDSM play: after all, the core principle of BDSM is the transfer of power. If you’re a submissive, wearing a ball gag is a great way to create a physical sensation of powerlessness as your partner dominates you. If you’re a dominant, seeing your partner wearing a ball gag will enhace all your sensations of power and control – what is more submissive than literally surrendering your ability to speak or express yourself verbally during sex? You should probably agree on a non-verbal safe word before engaging in play with a ball gag.
Best BDSM Sex Toys for BDSM Experts
So, you’re familiar with BDSM already. You know your sex slings from your sex swings, you know what aftercare is. If you’re looking to take your BDSM fantasies to the next level, we suggest the following expert-level BDSM sex toys:
Chastity Cage
For those who love the intense thrill of wearing a chastity device, the only thing better than sex is not having it! Using a chastity device is certainly not a beginner-friendly type of BDSM play: not only should you be already experienced with BDSM toys and BDSM sex, but you should only engage in chastity play with a partner that you know and trust. When performed in the right settings, chastity play can be an exhilarating, intense power transfer: whether you’re a submissive who loves to be tantalized and teased, or a dominant who loves prolonging the moment and making their partner squirm, a chastity device is sure to intensify your sex life!
BDSM Sex Machine
If you really want to take your BDSM adventure to the next level, investing in a BDSM sex machine is a sure way to keep your sex life interesting and unpredictable! A BDSM sex machine can be quite complicated to use, but its purpose is simple: one partner is chained or attached to the machine, which then simulates sex with the attached partner (typically via an attached dildo.) This can be an exhilerating experience for both partners: the dominated partner might enjoy watching the submissive surrender control both to them and the sex machine, while the submissive will enjoy both the pleasure from the sex machine as well as the feeling of total submission. This toy is really not for beginners: if you’re a beginner or intermediate BDSM toy user, you might want to opt for our other options before trying a BDSM sex machine.
